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This may be sung to the melody of AOh, Susannah!@ It was inspired by the Nigerian schmuck who tried to use a pantie-bomb to bring down an airliner approaching Detroit on Christmas Day, 2009. That and the fact that for several weeks afterward we had to endure looking at his stupid-looking face displayed prominently on the evening news.
I came from darkest Africa a calling for to find.
I got an education, then I went and lost my mind.
I trained as a physician so that sickness I could heal,
then I got duped by some imam=s bold martyrdom appeal.
Oh, Fatima, don= t you cry for me!
A big-shot Muslim martyr is just what I want to be.
The jihadis told me stories and they filled my brain with hate.
To go out on a mission, well, I simply couldn=t wait.
I didn=t check those stories out. I really didn=t care.
I just wanted to blast a plane to fragments in the air.
Oh, Fatima, we haven=t got a chance!
>Cause I=m traveling from Yemen with explosives in my pants.
I lit the fuse, there was a bang, and smoke for all to see.
The other passengers then beat the crap right out of me.
The dumb plot failed, the plane was safe, I=m feeling like a putz.
The bomb went off, it was too weak, it just blew off my nuts.
Oh, Fatima, I=m feeling like a fool.
Those mad jihadi gangsters only used me for a tool.
I wallow in self-pity in this God-forsaken jail.
I really should have known that this attack was going to fail.
Those jihadis don=t believe in God, they just don=t give a damn.
This whole jihad is just a crooked donor-sucking scam.
Oh, Fatima, this didn=t go so well.
>Cause I=ll be getting tortured when I die and go to Hell.
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